Mayor Wilkins - Quotes

  • "Using the shredder gives me a lift. It's fun"
    Season 3
  • "I swear, I would sell my soul for a decent short game. Of course, it's a little late for that. I don't suppose I could offer your soul, huh? Really help me on the green. I'm just funning"
    Season 3
  • "Loose cannon. Rock the boat. Is that a mixed metaphor? Boats did have cannons. And a loose one would cause it to rock."
    Season 3
  • "Who knows, with any luck, they'll kill each other. Then everyone's a winner. Everyone, of course, meaning me"
    Season 3
  • "Gosh, but I'm feeling chipper! Who's for a root-beer?"
    Season 3
  • "Do you think he was going to betray me? Oh, now, that's a horrible thought. And now he's dead, I'll never have the chance to scold him"
    Season 3
  • "Well, this is exciting. A Slayer, up for murder one. That's sunshine and roses to me, it really is"
    Season 3
  • "Shh, here comes my favorite part. Where the Slayers see us in the hall together, thick as thieves. Oh, wait, we are thieves. And worse"
    Season 3
  • "Of course I am. No Slayer of mine is gonna live in a fleabag hotel. That place has a very unsavory reputation. There are immoral liaisons going on there"
    Season 3
  • "Now, Faith, I don't find that sort of thing amusing. I'm a family man. Now, let's kill your little friend. Don't worry, I wouldn't ask you to do it. Not this early in the relationship. Besides, I think a vampire attack would look less suspicious, anyway. In the meantime, let's look at the rest of the apartment, huh? If I'm not mistaken, some lucky girl has herself a PlayStation"
    Season 3
  • "There's nothing uncool about healthy teeth and bones"
    Season 3
  • "A package is arriving tomorrow night from Central America. Something - and I can't stress this enough - something crucially important to my ascension. Without it... well, what would tollhouse cookies be without the chocolate chips? A pretty darn big disappointment, I can tell you!"
    Season 3
  • "A dog's friendship is stronger than reason, stronger than its own sense of self-preservation. Buffy's like a dog. And hey, before you can say 'Jack Robinson,' you'll get to see me kill her like one"
    Season 3
  • "Well, this is exciting, isn't it? Clandestine meetings by dark of night, exchange of prisoners. I just, I... I feel like we should all be wearing trenchcoats"
    Season 3
  • "She's pretty, Angel. A little skinny. Still don't understand why it couldn't work out with you and my Faith. I guess you kinda just have strange tastes in women"
    Season 3
  • "Sunnydale owes you a debt. It will be repaid. Yes, sir, we'll mark that invoice 'Paid in full"
    Season 3
  • "That's one spunky little girl you've raised. I'm gonna eat her"
    Season 3
  • "My god, what a feeling. The power of these creatures. It suffuses my being. I can feel the changes begin. My organs are shifting, merging, making ready for the Ascension. Plus these babies are high in fiber, and what's the fun of becoming an immortal demon if you're not regular, am I right?"
    Season 3
  • "Murderous little fiend. Did you see what she did to my Faith?"
    Season 3
  • "The show's not over, but there will be a short intermission. Don't want to miss the 2nd act. All kinds of excitement"
    Season 3
  • "No snacking! I see blood on your lips and it's a visit to the wood shed for you boys"
    Season 3
  • "Remember, fast and brutal. It's gonna be a whole new world come nightfall, don't want to weaken now. And boys? Let's watch the swearing"
    Season 3
  • "But on the other hand, heck, maybe we won. And right now, I'm on some jumbo monitor in the Richard Wilkins Museum, surrounded by a bunch of kids sitting Indian-style and looking up at my face, filled with fear and wonder. Hi, kids!"
    Season 4
  • "Here's the good news - just because it's over for my Faith, doesn't mean she can't go out with a bang"
    Season 4

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