Cordelia - Quotes

  • "Whatever. They were cranky. So they're like, 'Let's lose some heads!' Ugh, that's fair. And, eh, Marie Antoinette cared about them. She was gonna' let them have cake."
    Season 2
  • "I aspire to help my fellow man.' Check. As long as he's not smelly, dirty, or something gross."
    Season 2
  • "And what if she is, exactly? What are you gonna' do about it? In case you haven't noticed, you're the lameness and she's the super chick or whatever."
    Season 2
  • "I know, you were too busy rushing off to die for your beloved Buffy. You'd never die for me"
    Season 2
  • "This is great. There's an unkillable demon in town, Angel's joined his side, the Slayer's a basket case, I'd say we've hit bottom"
    Season 2
  • "We didn't come here to talk about Willow. We came here to do things... I can never tell my father about because he still thinks I'm a...good girl"
    Season 2
  • "Look around. We're in my daddy's car. It's just the two of us. There is a beautiful, big, full moon outside tonight. It doesn't get more romantic than this. So shut up!"
    Season 2
  • "And keep your mom-aged mitts off my boyfriend. Former!"
    Season 2
  • "You're a sheep. All you ever do is what everyone else does, just so you can say you did it first. And here I am, scrambling for your approval, when I'm way cooler than you are, 'cause I'm not a sheep. I do what I want to do, and I wear what I want to wear, and you know what? I date whoever the hell I want to date. No matter how lame he is."
    Season 2
  • "Why doesn't he just slit her throat, or strangle her while she's sleeping, or cut her heart out? What? I'm trying to help"
    Season 2
  • "Well, I was using the phrase 'watch her back' as a euphemism for looking at her butt. You know, sort of a pun."
    Season 2
  • "Gee, Xander, and what are you gonna' to teach when you fail in life? Advanced loser being?"
    Season 2
  • "Ooo, again, I strike the nerve. I am the surgeon of mean."
    Season 3
  • "Planning life as a loser? Most people just turn out that way, but you're really taking charge."
    Season 3
  • "It must be a drag to be stuck here in Sweatydale, but I'm thinking of you."
    Season 3
  • "My point however, crazy or not, is pretty much the only plan. Besides, it's Buffy's, and she's slay gal. You know, little Miss Likes-to-fight"
    Season 3
  • "Oh, God. Is the world ending? I have to research a paper on Bosnia for tomorrow, but if the world's ending, I'm not gonna bother"
    Season 3
  • "I wish all men except maybe the dumb and the really agreeable kind disappear off the face of the earth. That would be so cool!"
    Season 3
  • "Ooo, is some evil going on?"
    Season 3
  • "He didn't try to slit our throats or anything. That's progress."
    Season 3
  • "Ooo, look, it's Mr. Excitement. On another life-or-death doughnut mission, or are we just cruising for bimbos again, giving them lessons in lack of cool?"
    Season 3
  • "Hi Mr. Beach. Are you planning on killing a bunch of people tomorrow? Oh, it's for the yearbook"
    Season 3
  • "Actually, I'm looking forward to it. I do well on standardized tests. What? I can't have layers?"
    Season 3
  • "Do guns make you wanna have sex?"
    Season 3
  • "What is it with you and Slayers? Maybe I should dress up as one, and put a stake to your throat"
    Season 3

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